Unanswered questions...
firstly, to update on #26.. He was a pleasant surprise.. A decent, normal guy, with nice-enough shoes (I have mentioned this before, so don't ask okay), not too bad looking, friendly, and I had a really nice time, and we chatted and had a few good laughs... anyone feel like a But is coming up???
BUT...
I left after we had coffee , and i didn't know what i was feeling. I was driving home, trying to figure out what i thought about the whole date, and for the life of me, i just couldn't tell whether i felt happy, or sad.. Normally, the minute i leave, I'm on the phone with shakeera, telling her how awful/awesome/gross the whole ordeal was, but this time i felt as though i was I'm limbo... And it is a really unsettling feeling to have. I'm not sure why... And I'm sure that I'm just been silly/stupid/ridiculous, but i just don't know what i want anymore...
so, i was talking to
Zee, and told him how it went, and since he has always been my voice of reason (too an extent) , i asked him, what the general rule of thumb was... How do people decide what they looking for? How does one find someone, met someone, and just know... All these people that are married/ soon-to-be married /engaged /in a serious relationship always have the irritating line (that just makes me wanna scream)... it goes like this "you just know, when the time is right, you just know') and i am sorry, but people that line, just irk me... so, i ask my fellow single (or attached friends, as long as you don't tell me' you just know') .. Is there such a thing? will we JUST KNOW?(I'm sorry, i know i promised to never mention this again on my blog, but i have to..) when i met Loser Guy, i thought it was perfect, I JUST KNEW.. I felt as though i had known him all my life, and I had found a missing part of myself.. One of my friends even said we look slightly similar(i DO NOT look like Mr Bean hehehe) , but all that went horribly wrong, and i ended up getting really hurt, and that's when i started questioning my whole "soul-mate' theory..) so, is it possible that the situations that start off being perfect and go horribly wrong, are wrong.. and those that start off being not wrong,-per say- but, not perfect, are the relationships that actually adjust to your liking, and maybe have the potential of becoming something right?
What do you have to endure to find that person? Zee said expecting the stars in the sky/moon to shine more brightly etc (Basically all the emotion/drama that goes hand-in-hand with finding your soul-mate) is all just cotton-fluff, and it is all about compromise... Now, maybe I do watch too many bollywood movies, but i have this fear regarding compromise and just settling for someone.. What if I just settle,due to pressure, and fear of being alone forever... (with a seemingly good guy) , and then the scene from KANK happens 7 years from now? what then? what would you do? or do u just kiss all your fairytale endings goodbye, and grow up and make a decision and live with it?
I met up with some old friends last night, and while i was entertaining them with my woeful tales of blind-date horrors i realised something... which isn't a good thing... Every person that i have met so-far, Have given me some sort of idea, of what kind of person I am NOT looking for,and the things that the person SHOULDN'T be, but it has also made me more confused, and lost and has taken me further away from the things that i AM looking for...
7 comments:
Never seen KANK, not sure I ever want to....
Ruby....I think you need to change your Username to SINGLE GIRL....
I think the two of use feel very similarly about our future partners...We don't know what we want...but we know what we don't want!
And to answer the question of how do you know? I don't think there can be such a thing....I felt very comfortable with Psycho-chick even at one stage...like we'ed known each other our whole lives...but ultimately as you know, that was an absolute dogshow in the end. I don't think we could ever KNOW if we're doing the right thing....I think that what will happen is, we'ed become comfortable with that person, and be HAPPY, trust them unconditionally with our lives...and then we'ed make that decision.
In the end....We can never know what's going to occur in the future....All we can do is to choose not to be with people who are more likely to hurt us in one way or another.
That's my story, and I'm sticking with it.
single guy: yeah, we def. on the same page... lets hope we make the right decisions though.. I agree that we should look for people that we are comfortable with, but i dont want boring comfortable, i wnat excitement, and buteerflies, and stars.. everyhting that zee says, does not exist.. but, how else did all the other people in the world find their soul-mates.. surely not everyone compromised right? "trust them unconditionally" this is something im terrified of doing.. been there, done that, got the stab.. im the perfect example of twice bitten, third time .. run away... lol..
im considering the name change, but it will have to be Single-girl-ruby so that my theme song can still apply!!
Ruby sweety,we def need to get together soon so we can exchange tales. I agree, settling isnt an option. Was gr8 chattin 2 u. Hope to c u soon
I wanna know why cant it just be simple. Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, girl liek boy...happily ever after. This mental side to it "what do i really want" and the heart part "bleh" I dunno. Not making mush sense am I. Well neither does the whole "finding the one" story because truely is there really sucha thing as the one.
Sorry a rant
dear ruby
i sympathise with you. being there done those horrible blind dates 16 times i cant stand it anymore. but i read something interesting the other day and the author said you have to believe that somewhere in the world there is someone looking for a person like you.
hang in there!
Two points...
1. It obvious that the K-man is not a Romantic.
2. Anonymous....all that is good and well....but what if you are not looking for that person looking for you?
BB: have to def. meet up soon, just let me know when you back in JHb..
K-MAn: nothing is simple anymore.. sadly..
Anon: 16, hahaha, i beat you!! lol.. "you have to believe that somewhere in the world there is someone looking for a person like you." if he is out there, he beeter look really hard, for both of us, cos i have given up the search for Mr. Ruby..
Single Guy: you know, i think we think alike, and hopefully, there is a girl out tehre searching for you at this moment in time, whilst you continue the search from your side, and hopefully you may just bump into her soon!!!
Post a Comment